Funny Halloween Jokes, Quotes, and Sayings

Funny Halloween Quotes and Sayings

"I bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun of Halloween." - Author unknown
"There are three things that I never learned to talk with people: religion, politics and the Great Pumpkin." - Linus 'It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown'
"Charlie Brown is the only person that I identify. CB is a loser. It was not even the star of his own Halloween special." - Chris Rock
"Nothing in the world is as beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night. - Steve Almond
"On Halloween, parents sent their children looking like me." - Rodney Dangerfield
"This Halloween the most popular mask is the mask of Arnold Schwarzenegger. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you sound just like him." - Conan O'Brien
"Just like a ghost, was a hauntin:" My dream, then I propose that for Halloween. Love is a crazy girl like you goosebumps. "- The Classics IV
"Studio 54 on the day of Halloween in the eyes of Hollywood as a meeting of parents." - Lorna Luft
"They do very little about South Park, and my name and had a character of me judging a Halloween contest. It 'was really fun. I was the coolest aunt in the world." - Tina Yothers
"Being in a group, you can wear whatever you want - it's like an excuse for Halloween everyday." - Gwen Stefani

Scary and creepy Halloween Quotes

"Eye of Newt, and bottom of frog, wool of bat and tongue of dog, Adder's fork, worms, and stinging eyes, leg lizard and Owlet's wing for a charm of powerful trouble, Like a boil and boil the broth Hell. "- William Shakespeare
"Double, toil and trouble, burn and cauldron bubble." - Shakespeare's Macbeth '
"From Ghoulies and Ghosties and long-term leggedy bugs and things that go Bump in the Night, Lord, deliver us!" - Scottish Saying
"Delivering on the raisins and nuts-Tonight All-Hallows Specter Struts' On the path of the moon." - John Kendrick Bangs
"Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can not see where it keeps its brain." - JK Rowling, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
"My candle was nearly burnt, when the glimmer of the half-light off, I saw the dull yellow eye of the creature open ..." - Mary Shelley's Frankenstein

Funny Halloween Jokes

Q. What do the skeletons say be for eating? A. Bone appetite
Q. What happens when two vampires meet? R. E 'was love at first bite!
Q. What is the favorite song of at least a vampire? A. Another bites the dust!
Q. Why was the mummy so tense? R. Why was liquidated.
Q. Why did not the skeleton go to see a horror movie? A. He had the courage.
Q. What do you call two spiders that just married? A. Newlywebbed
Q. Why did not the skeleton cross the road? A. To go to the body shop.
Q. What is the most famous ghost detective? A. Sherlock groans.